(A Lack of) Respect

I have been noticing a disturbing trend among the youth today. I have been witness to a number of incidents which make me wonder where and when parents decided it was alright for their children to be impolite to adults.

Today a student called a teacher a jerk, simply because he told the students they would not be turning in the homework they had done yesterday, and she had torn the sheet out of her notebook. Does that reaction seem over the top? Does it seem appropriate? I am sure when I was a teenager my mother would have knocked my head off my shoulders if I chose to speak to an adult that way. I also heard this same teacher be spoken to in a tone that was disrespectful by a different student, within ten minutes of the first student calling him the name.

This all took place after two teachers and I attempted to walk down the hallway prior to the first bell. I say attempted because students were sitting against their lockers, on both sides of the hallway, with their legs stretched out, causing difficulty for anyone attempting to walk two abreast down the hallway. The students made no move to pull their legs out of the way, apparently oblivious to the fact there are other human beings on the planet besides themselves. When asked to move their legs, only one student complied.

Is this a sign that I am old? Or is it really a sign regarding other people's pattern of rearing children?

I remember getting into an argument with a customer when I was a bartender. He told me I should respect my elders. Now, I was raised to do this, saying "Yes ma'am" or "No sir," and to call adults Mr. or Mrs. Last Name, until given permission to call said adult by a first name, etc. I was in my mid to late twenties, and already had a child of my own, when this argument with a customer was happening. I looked at him and said "They have to earn the respect first." It brought him up short, and made him think a bit. (Go ME!!)

Does that make me a hypocrite? No, I don't believe so. I believe that adults do have to earn further respect than an initial meeting will bring. What that means, because I am sure it is unclear, is that every person I encounter is given an immediate respect for simply being a fellow human being (and a bit extra if they are elderly, or at least older than me), UNTIL said person begins to interact with me in a manner which does not call for further respect on my part, usually when the person fails to show me respect in a like manner. In the less roundabout version, if a younger person feels an older person does not deserve respect, there should be a darn good reason, at least in my book.

I have raised my own children to respect their elders, to be polite and courteous to others. This has caused problems for them, as they are treated as welcome mats by others their own age. I want my children to be courteous and respectful, but I sure do not want them to be walked on either. Trying to balance teaching the respect and courteousness with "there's a time and a place to not back down from some jerk" is a difficult responsibility. Especially in light of my road rage and lack of patience with stupidity  ignorance.

I am thankful that my children are respectful. Little Man has earned a tip for holding a door for a lady during a rainstorm, and Girl has been given a treat for her manners. They see there are tangible rewards, but to them, those are just extras. They act appropriately because they believe it is the right way to act. Why is this not standard anymore? Why is there no accountability for actions? [That's a whole new post and a giant can of worms there!]

Anyway, food for thought, and remember, try to make the world around you a bit more soft and fuzzy for others! Lotsa love gentle readers!